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I somehow have the ability to give 34 faps.

HELLO DEAREST FELLOW READERS. My name is Zombie Orwell. You may know me from such legendary Cblogs as Help I Can't Find My Jar Of Pickles and I Somehow Have The Ability To Give 34 Faps. Well, I'm back again sort of like Eminem except I didn...

 
 
 
 

Let's break the internet together!

I'm stepping out of character for a second. Anyone who doesn't like it is a fat, one-armed comedian. Also an idiot. There's a battle raging right on the internet right now. Wait, I mean there are a hundred million battles raging on the...

 
 
 
 
 
 

Skullfucking the Great American Novel.

We all love Gatsby, right? The prose is damn near perfect. The end of Chapter One sends shivers crawling around your temples. And that end; boats against the current and shit. Good shit. Fitzgerald was a god. But Game of Thrones walke...

 
 
 

How To Seduce Like A Terrorist, part one.

Why hello I did not see you come in. I was too busy being both seductive and terrifying. You see, I am the terrorist who also is an amazing pick up artist. That is highly cool and unique. Anywho, let's get down to brass taxes. Dis righ...

 
 
 

Dreamweaver inspired this blog.

Hello Dtoid. The charming zombie character I created is going to shut up for a minute because I need to spill some real talk. Some hot fire. Some mad education. I feel confident saying most of you fit in one or more of the following ca...

 
 
 
 
 

Pictures of cows

This is where I introduce the blog. Hello everybody. This is a special blog made spontaneously for the Dzord. Lately there has been a lot of sadness and angst and hostility and other words on my favorite website. I'm not gonna take anyon...

 
 
 

Free things can be yours

My transcriptionist has completed work on Episode 1 of Kilonova Complex (available on Kobo and Amazon).  It's serial fiction in the sci fi (meaning Science Fience) genre. There's a description in the comments section below. Episode 2 will...

 
 
 
 
 
 

A heartfelt, out-of-character moment.

Hey Dtoid. Right now I don't have any Zombie Orwell in me. This is the guy behind the voice. What I'm gonna do goes against the unwritten rules of the character I've created, but I've reached an interesting and terrifying and exhilarating p...

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

NotToid questions?

The time has come for you to insert questions into my comments section. And to post pictures of drunk people. Do this now. Your leader, Zombie Orwell

 
 
 

NotToid questions?

Dearest horrible awful filthies, Tonight I will engage in furtive attempts at "pod casting" with two well known Dtoiders. You may guess their names if you wish. Barring any technical difficulties, I would like to include some of your repr...

 
 
 
 
 

DTOID - YOU HAVE 24 HOURS TO COMPLY

My last post was taken as an idle threat by the powers that be. It was not an idle threat. Cities WILL burn. Millions WILL die. But all of these horrors CAN be avoided if you DO WHAT I SAY Give me Podtoid within 24 hours or a...

 
 
 

Give me Podtoid.

Podtoid is dead. It has been dead for several weeks. And its corpse has been flogged and quartered by some podcast called the Dismayed Jackals, hosted by a defector and two moles planted in Dtoid and trying to destroy us. Podtoid must come ...

 
 
 
 

Hi. I'm the leader of the Destructzord. AMA

Dearest dearest ridiculous people, You already know everything about me. You know where I live, you know my status as a post-deceased citizen, you know I'm the most Orwellian being ever to grace this lovely website, you know that The Devas...

 
 
 

About Zombie Orwellone of us since 3:07 PM on 03.30.2012

My fellow internet zombie brethren:

It is my specious pleasure to be addressing you in the fullness of time. My name is Zombie Orwell. You will be hearing a lot from me in the coming months as we ratchet up the intensity of our Zombie Rights Revolution.

I wish all of you safe human-hunting. Please message me ([email protected]) if you have questions or free tacos.

I love you!
 
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