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Of all that’s ever drawn dread from deep within me, Miss Piggy pursuing me on roller skates remains my most vivid waking nightmare, my constant companion these long years: relentless, fury-filled, remorseless swine, she haunts my waking hours.



- From my cold, dead hands.




 
 

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About The Actual Charlton Hestonone of us since 6:46 AM on 12.24.2017

I'm actually Charlton Heston. What, were you expecting some purple prose? An overwrought introduction? Get off of my property, you filthy God damn hippie.