When I’m in bed watching Discovery Channel and my wife tries to change the channel to Real Housewives.

It’s this hot today.

Old Miyamoto.

Great. Like regular gators weren't bad enough. This is why we can't have nice things. https://nypost.com/2019/07/15/tennessee-police-advise-public-over-threat-of-meth-gators/

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I had a client meeting today that I was DREADING, but they needed to cancel due to an emergency. I got the same feeling like I was back in high school (over 21 years ago) when I flaked on an assignment only to come in and see a substitute.

Happy Birthday 🎈 USA

Just found out that 45,000 barrels of Jim Beam were lost in a warehouse fire.

I think I’m suffering from PTSD after attending my daughter’s Girl Scouts event. Over 100 girls, hopped up on treats in the hot sun all day. The bickering, the singing, the screaming..... the horror.

Woke up this morning and was craving sushi for breakfast.

Wow, this ended on a really dark note.

From one hot dad, to hot dads everywhere, Happy Father’s Day.

It’s been a blessedly uneventful Friday at the office. This calls for only one thing...

I like to believe that there is a special place in hell for those who watch videos on their phones without headphones in public bathrooms, interrupting the peace of my morning glory.

At a wedding with the wife and I’m stone cold sober because I’m being a responsible adult. However, watching old white people dance to disco is ridiculously entertaining.

A beautiful Saturday evening and I’m sitting in this shit trying to get into NYC. Rather be home grilling and drinking. The shit I do for my wife.

This tastes like diesel and ass at the same time, but it’s giving me an immediate buzz, so not bad.

Over the weekend, I held a family Mortal Kombat 11 tournament at the house. I DOMINATED. My 6, 7, 10, 12 year-old nieces and nephews stood no chance against me. I showed no mercy. UNDEFEATED CHAMPION!

Watching Halle Berry train for John Wick 3 makes me feel all funny, in a good way.

Lizard person pretending to be a human on the sideline of playoff basketball game. I’m on to you.

My reaction reading about Sony/MS cloud-based gaming strategic partnership. I guess they're taking Google Stadia seriously.

Happy Mother’s Day everyone.

Woke up this morning with a nasty cold and PINK EYE! What the fucking fuck. Also, the urgent care this morning is apparently the place to be.

The wife went out with her friends tonight, so I’m watching the kids. This puts a damper on my regular Friday night plans.

CRIKEY!

Dealing with the real-life energy vampire on my team. Today's challenge. It requires detailed instructions on how to do a simple task. It's just easier to do it my self.

Has anyone ever taken a dump that smelled so bad it made you gag? Doing a cleanse, eating super clean, and this is how my body reacts.

So SharePoint is experiencing major issues. My company uses SharePoint extensively and the majority of my files are now not accessible. There is only one option.

The new Sonic trailer reminds me of a time back in college when I dropped bad acid and had a terrifying 24 hour trip... but worse.