Bbain's Jukebox, Shade-Style: Robots

Hello and welcome once again to Bbain's Jukebox!

It's been an interesting couple of weeks on Destructoid what with the big lay-out overhaul and such. By now though, it seems Niero has overcome all the major obstacles, and the Cblogs are back in action like never before two weeks ago. Sounds to me like I should take the new and possibly improved site for a spin. And what better way to do that than through the power of music?

Today's theme is going to be 'robots', and I think you can guess why. Besides Andy Dixon, Mr. Destructoid is the most important mascot we've got, and he is 100% complete and total Robot. Irresistable to dudes and chicks alike, our Robotic Overlord (hail!) has got it all. The songs below are for him. Plus I recently got assimilated into robot-hood too, so they're a little bit for me as well.

Before we start, has anybody made sure to restrain Wrenchfarm? No? Well better do that first then, because he's about to go crazy.

"Robo's Theme" - Chrono Trigger


This song was the first that came to mind when I decided on today's theme, and I wouldn't be surpised if the same goes for many of you. But you know what's funny? Despite this being the first thing that came to mind, I actually had to look up this song first because I had completely forgotten how it goes. It's been too long since I played Chrono Trigger, that's for sure.

Fortunately, when I hit the Play button all of those memories came rushing back. My instincts haven't betrayed me yet, Robo's Theme deserves to be at the forefront of everybody's mind and/or circuitry.

"Dr. Wily's Castle" - Mega Man 2


Another oldy but goody. I put it to you that there is not better song out there that celebrates the superiority of metal over man. This song is all about a little robot who isn't just a normal man (of course not!), he's a Mega Man. And this little Mega robot warrior is leading the charge against a lowly human who thinks he stands a chance.

That human will soon learn the error of his ways.

"Mechonis Field" - Xenoblade Chronicles


I tried to keep Xenoblade out of the Jukebox for as long as I could. If I didn't, you can bet it would be on every single entry. I could do it easily. This one though, I just had to include. Xenoblade has one of the biggest robots this side of Gurren Lagann; the Mechonis. The Mechonis is so large that he functions as a continent, with sprawling landmasses you can go explore to your heart's content.

The Mechonis is not uninhabited either: smaller robots make this place their home. A lot of them live inside the Mechonis on Mechonis Field. When you finally reach that mechanical place, you are greeted by this music. It's not as fast-paced as many other Robot songs, and it's not as stuffed with beeps and boops as you might expect. But to a robot, this music is what dreams are made of.

"Dr. Nefarious" - Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal


And we're back to the kickin' rad songs our robotic overlords deserve. Dr. Nefarious truly is an example to us all. He's smart, evil, has wicked good looks, and most importantly he hates organics. Now that is what you call a fine specimen of metal.

This song plays during the final battle of Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal. Brave Dr. Nefarious makes his last stand as he is being attacked by a team of a cowardly organic and a traitor to robot-kind. The music is suitably grand and booming for the majesty of the good doctor. With that in the background, there's no way he could lose.

"A Time for Change" - Thomas Was Alone


Many people forget that robots aren't just about their metal exterior. Sure, that's one very important aspect of why they're so effective at slaughtering humans, but it's hardly the only reason. Behind every good robot head lies a magnificent AI, without which robots are about as effective at killing humans as the common cold. It would be a shameful display. More than any other game, Thomas Was Alone appreciates the power of the AI. It understands the importance of a functioning artificial brain, which can come from humble beginnings to attain greatness.

The best song on the Thomas Was Alone soundtrack says what we're all thinking. Time for change. It's a time for change at Destructoid, and as soon as we commence Phase 2 it will be a time for change for the entire world.

Beep boop, that's all for now, meatbags. By now you must realize the superior quality of robotic songs as compared to lowly human music. It is the only logical conclusion. I hope you all experienced the emotion listed in my databanks as "fun" while listening to this music. We will make sure to run some of these as background music to the inevitable uprising.

And remember everyone: Robots FTW.

"Robots FTW" - Portal 2


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- Us heroes, we have so much to do

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