(One of these days, one of these days I’ll write two blogs in a row without getting sick and disappearing for a few months.) Well, here we are again. After last times shocking exposé you think game developers wouldn’t try to pull this sor...

Once upon a time there was a little shepherd boy who looked after the sheep of a village, the boy loved spending time with the sheep, you see these were special interactive sheep, he much preferred them over the other the other, more passiv...

How dare you, Capcom. You’ve got some nerve, waltzing in here like you own the place and slapping your loyal fans right in fucking face with your giant ball-top style cock. After everything I’ve done for you, Capcom, you have the cheek, the...

Darksiders 2 is nothing if not thematically consistent... I’ll be generous here and ignore the poorly textured floor made entirely of skulls. I realise I missed his knees here but I also ignored the big pile of skulls...

Merry Christmas Destructoid! Chances are if you’re reading this you’re having a lovely time relaxing by the warm glow of the internet, or, you had to get the hell out of there and let your brain rest for a minute, either way my mind-dulling...

(I know, worst title ever) Hey, you know those stupid prediction articles that are all made up of guesswork skewed by the writer’s personal preferences, the ones that serve to only stroke the writer’s ego as they furrow their brows and pre...

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the Destructoid blog series that stole its intro style from Annotated Anime over on Japanator, and I bet you didn’t even notice! For those not in the know, or the unscarred as we call them, Fanart Flops is a colle...

My god it feels like forever since I wrote something, mostly because of this thick slurry of videogames we call October to January, one such game being Dark Souls, a game I have no doubt led to at least one divorce or child beating out of t...

Some time ago, Bioware announced that they would be holding a vote on the default appearance of the female protagonist of Mass Effect, commonly referred to as “FemShep”. The vote was held, the people spoke, and a blonde FemShep was chosen...

PAX is upon us, the Destructoid social event of the year, where the who’s who of videogames come to rub shoulders and sip fine champagne out of hollowed out Mega Drive cartridges. And, much like any enjoyable social event, I won’t be ther...

[Disclaimer Thingamajig: This is more or less the same as a blog I posted at the start of the year, but it seemed to fit in with the topic for Monthly Musing or Weekly-whatever-we-call-it-now, so I thought I’d put it up again. Anyway this i...

A rather specific topic for a list blog no? But it’s come to my attention that a certain type of woman repeatedly appears in games lately. Right alongside the women that only exist to be saved, the ones who are just walking plot devices, or...

My friends, a storm approaches. Not a storm of wind and rain, but a storm of information and other metaphors I can’t think of right now because I’ve been drinking. But as we stand before this harsh gale, ready to be soaked to the bone, I of...

Hello Destructoid, wow it’s been so long, you’re looking good, have you lost weight? I’ve finally made my long awaited (by no one) return to the sandy shores of Destructoid beach, where the fish are always biting and it’s okay to stomp on s...

Hey, you know what sucks? Hospitals. I should know, I’ve been in one for the last three weeks and can expect to stay there for a few more still. Thankfully, however, I’m now well enough to spend the weekends at home, and what’s the first th...

Cereal business this time guys. Like, super cereal. I’m talking Branflakes, yo. In the last year we’ve heard a lot about Western vs. Eastern design philosophy, how many times have you seen the comments section of an article devolve into...

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the Destructoid blog that feeds off your disgust and broken childhood nostalgia like a sponge made of hate. This time we focus on the popular fantasy cockfighting simulator for children, Pokemon! Pokemon and I hav...

Welcome to Fanart Flops, the only Destructoid blog that makes you envy the blind. This time we explore one of the most prevalent areas of video game fanart, Final Fantasy, the game series so big it’s even become cliché to point out its clic...

Remember those games from your childhood? The ones that take up some prime real estate in your heart? One of particular significance for me was Sonic the Hedgehog. Things were so much simpler back then.....the closest thing to a personality...

So PAX is coming up, and in an attempt to subside the murderous jealousy I feel at the prospect of not being able to go I have decided to present you, dear Dtoider, the opportunity of a lifetime. That’s right! For the low low price of FREE ...

Fanart is a fickle fellow. In the hands of a talented artist with a genuine love for the game it can turn out to be a wonderful tribute to a character or series, in the hands of a less talented artist it can turn out to be a picture of Soni...

Hey everybody, you’re looking nice today, did you do something with your hair? I keep trying to write something about E3 (you know, because nobody’s done that in the last two weeks) but I haven’t been able to get it together, and I figure I...

Ah E3, that special time of year when everyone in the games industry piles into one place to perform self masturbatory speeches in a bid for attention. It’s a lot like a sack full of badgers, a bunch of feral animals clawing away at each ot...

You know, sometimes when you’re feeling low nothing helps more than laughing at people who are worse off than you. Indulging yourself in a little schadenfreude now and then is good for the soul, at least that’s what my teacher used to say b...

Legal guardians in games are a funny thing, they usually come in one of two varieties – #1 they’re dead or #2 they’re complete dicks.......my list of gaming’s deadest parents was kind of depressing so I did this instead. You might be wonder...