I'll show you inanimate!

Embiggened by the flame of ambition.

Anyway, I returned to Bloodborne after like a month and beat Laurence the Annoying Boss Run, so now I can direct my attention to the screaming alien and get my face beaten in with his... ham club? Brain sword?

Important reminder these days:

This is super fucking weird. Nothing about this deranged project make any sense to me. I guess Disney executives just eat drugs instead of food at this point.

Could never have predicted this outcome.

They're making a new Mario Strikers? Sweet!

typical wednesday

BIG NEWS: Microsoft has bought my right asscheek and Sony has bought my left. Neither will be console exclusive yet, but the contract does require me to wear these pants:

SPICY CONTROVERSIAL OPINION: Wordle hard mode is actually easier because it often prevents you from wasting guesses.

The most important video of the year is already here.

That was a messed up thing to do and I'm sorry.

Gonna have to empty my apartment to make room for my GIANT BRAIN!

Castlevania but the final boss is Winnie the Pooh and you play as Bambi.

I had the craziest dream last night! There was this place called 'the ocean', and it was just a fucking ass-ton of undrinkable water that covered most of the planet. I'm glad we live in a normal world without any wacky shit like that in it.

I watched Knives Out yesterday, only to discover that it was NOT the movie about people hunting each other through a mansion that I saw a trailer for a couple of years ago. Still managed to enjoy it despite confusing myself.

, you filthy animals!

The Last Guardian

"And then he finally fucked the Oscars. The end." *closes book*

ponder deez nuts

Nobody was surprised.

"Could be one of them midget slave houses I've been hearing so much about."

I wanted to keep this going and see how many video game quotes you guys could recognise, but it's too hard to think of ones that aren't either obvious or nearly impossible.

I'm gonna hire Lorena to market my next book.

And that's how CJ became JC.