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Bob-The Waifus of Hyrule Warriors


I am late to the game. This blog is actually for last month's Band of Bloggers prompt: Leading Ladies. I really struggled with this prompt. I realized that I don't play many games where I play as a woman, except for games where I choose to like in Skyrim or Mass Effect. I don't know that those would really be interesting to write about (although FemShep is best Shep). It's been really interesting to realize that all of my favorite games have male protagonists. We really need more leading ladies in this industry.

A few days ago I realized I hadn't touched Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition in a few months. I picked it back up a couple nights ago. It's a marvelous game. Wonderful for co-op. My wife and I really love playing it together. I am eager for a sequel!

There's much to like about this game. The basic gameplay loop is super addictive. It is a total power fantasy. When you play Hyrule Warriors, you are a giant among insects. There is nothing you cannot do! I love the massive cast of characters, many of whom are women. I'd like to just mention a few of the awesome ladies in this game and talk briefly about why I like them.

Image result for hyrule warriors cia


One of several original characters for Warriors, Cia is a fantastic villain. She breaks all of time just to bang Link. That's dedication! She freaks me out in the best way possible. She's tall, gorgeous, voluptous, and powerful. She isn't my favorite to play, however. She's a bit of a slower moving hard-hitter. I prefer characters that are highly agile. 10/10

Image result for hyrule warriors marin


Marin is adorable and lovely. She is the best love interest Link ever had. She hails from Koholint Island of Link's Awakening. She fights with a magical bell that fires musical notes as projectiles. She evokes fun and charm in all of her movements. 11/10

Image result for hyrule warriors lana


Lana is another original character for warriors. She's a powerful sorceress. She's very cute and petite, but packs a punch where it counts. She has 3 different weapons to fight with and they are each very different from each other. I really enjoy her Summoning Gate. She just summons monsters to fight for her. It never gets old to summon a giant Cucco to lay waste to your enemies. She's kind of interesting as a character in that *spoilers* she is in love with Link. She loves him so much that half of her personality breaks off and turns into Cia, the main villain. It's pretty weird anime stuff, but it's fun. 8/10

Image result for hyrule warriors twili midna

Twili Midna

Midna's true form is everyone's Goth fantasy girl. She is dark, mysterious, elegant, and dangerous. She uses her massive power to summon orbs of light that explode on the battlefield and obliterate evil. Very fun to play. 10/10

Image result for hyrule warriors tetra


Imagine if Zelda had an actual personality and was also a pirate! That's Tetra. Sweet and sassy. Sharp as a cutlass. She is agile. She has a mixed of ranged and melee attacks. Great fun to play. 10/10

Image result for hyrule warriors great fairy

Great Fairy

This giant fairy woman keeps Link in a jar like a pet. He technically wields her as a weapon. It's all very kinky. But she is a total beast in battle. She moves a bit slowly, but she will destroy absolutely everything in her wake. She flies over the battle and is extremely difficult for enemies to even hit. She's very OP. And admit it. We've all been aroused and terrified of her since Ocarina of Time and we've never quite gotten over it. 11/10

Image result for hyrule warriors linkle


Best girl Linkle is the cutest thing since God invented hedgehogs. Literally everything she does is overwhelmingly adorable. My wife mains Linkle and has dramatically over-leveled her. My wife is content to continue to play Linkle until she maxes out. Linkle is an original character for Warriors and she has been given tons of personality. Essentially, her grandmother believed in her and was convinced she was the hero of legend. She gave Linkle a magic compass and sent her out the door. In the story, Linkle is perpetually cleaning up after Link's messes. Link has the main adventure. But after he leaves a region of Hyrule, trouble fills the vaccuum he left behind. Linkle must go in and make things right. And she does an excellent job of it! She is one of the most powerful characters. She dual wields crossbows. She has 360 degrees of firing capabilities. She can throw massive bombs at enemies. She is arguably the best all-around character in the entire game. I don't think Nintendo will do this, but I desperately want the next main Zelda game to let you play as Linkle if you choose. 1000/10

I haven't even unlocked every character (in spite of being over 70 hours into the game). I may not have even found all of the waifus! This game is just overflowing with powerful, beautiful women and I love it. 

Who are your favorite characters to play in Hyrule Warriors?

- Domo Arigato Mr. Roboto

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About Boxman214one of us since 11:17 AM on 01.02.2016