Guerrilla blog header photo
Guerrilla's c-blog
Fronts 2Posts 186Blogs 4Following 0Followers 37



Only the Poor Hate Lootboxes - A Long Haiku


I Purchased the High Ground


The box of loot beckons
The smell of skins is sickly sweet
Money is never an issue
An option for gamers provided
Time is fleeting and cash is flush 
Gotta get that rifle decal
The poor and weak object
But for one who’s purse doth overfloweth
Happiness is bought for whales 
1.99 for an unlock key
A bargain if you aren’t a homeless 
Fuck me it’s another spray
Gamblor demands a golden sacrifice 
Moths in the wallet of uneducated goobers
Icons and voice lines forsooth
Petty cries of economy ignored
But Blizzard set the store prices themselves
Buy it all and smile
Pay to win is capitalism 
Penniless don’t deserve to compete on leaderboards
Get a job smelly hippie 
Bankrupt myself for Mercy skin
Flying angel is hotter in neon pink
Feels like I’m alive again
Press X to pay respects
Piece meal downloadable content is dead again
Box it up and charge
Spin the wheel of mayhem
Pick the wicked wango card of possibility 
A duplicate is fair reward 
My gun is slightly different 
Your gun has default green camo fucking peasant 
My shaft stiffens and throbs 
The box of loot beckons
The smell of skins is sickly sweet
I can finally buy everything 
- Guerrilla

- #Icarus

Login to vote this up!


Kevin Mersereau   118
Gajknight   97
Seymour   42
Rad Party God   38
LaTerry   36
Zalno   15
Salador   15
Roager   10
Gamemaniac3434   7



Please login (or) make a quick account (free)
to view and post comments.

 Login with Twitter

 Login with Dtoid

Three day old threads are only visible to verified humans - this helps our small community management team stay on top of spam

Sorry for the extra step!


About Guerrillaone of us since 12:30 AM on 02.28.2016

What can I even tell you? My favourite video games in no particular order? Fine.

Timesplitters 2
Super Mario World
The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Persona 4
Dragon Quest VIII
Paper Mario: Thousand Year Door
Resident Evil 4
Skies of Arcadia
Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
Rocket League
Gundam Breaker 3
Pokemon Crystal
Super Smash Bros. Melee
Final Fantasy IX
Super Mario Galaxy 2
Hitman: Blood Money
Mega Man 4
Fallout: New Vegas
Mario Kart: Double Dash
Dishonored 2
Dark Souls
Nier: Automata