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LONG BLOG

Within Emptiness Unobstructed

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Today is a pretty hard day for me. This has been a really tough year for me, and as I'm trying to stay positive days like today just really make it difficult.

To start, if you know me, you know I'm VERY passionate about music, in particular, heavy metal. I live and breathe the stuff. A major inspiration for anything creative I've EVER produced, from my fiction writing, poetry and even most characters I've created in video games. Anything.

One of my biggest inspirations and biggest idols is the late Chuck Schuldiner, founder, guitarist and vocalist of the bands Death and Control Denied. The man had a vision and nearly single-handedly created a sub-genre of music, despite any and all obstacles presented to him. He was an extremely kind and passionate individual to boot. Unfortunately he succumbed to a lengthy battle with a brain tumor in 2001, dying at the young age of 34. (A mere year older than myself.) Today, December 13th is the 16 year anniversary of his death.

Today I woke sad in knowing this was the day that my idol passed away, only to find that another one of my major musical influences, Warrel Dane passed away this morning to a severe heart attack at the age of 48. Warrel Dane was the vocalist for Sanctuary and Nevermore. Nevermore being one of my top three favorite bands ever. And Dane being one of my top three favorite vocalists ever.

I'm fucking crushed. It's left me in a pretty deep depression coming from a week where I've also seriously worried over my own health and mortality due to some health complications. In my time of weakness all the weight of this terrible year has just come crashing down onto my back and flattened me. What may seem insignificant to some, has left me in tears as I'm typing this today. Two of my heroes died today.


The world feels like a much emptier place today than it did even yesterday. Warrel Dane, Chuck Schuldiner, may you both rest in peace. You changed my life is so many positive ways. Thank you.

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About Xeoone of us since 1:36 AM on 02.21.2011