Alright, y'all ready for this?
So I had been sick for like a week and then after I was starting to feel better sick wise, I noticed that I hadn't pooped in awhile. Which is weird for me, I poop every day. I usually poop at the same time too. But each day went by.....no poop. My brain went craze with worry. My belly bloated with all the extra shit building inside of me. I couldn't release the shit from the day before. All I wanted to do was shit out that poop baby. I was ready to give birth, but this poop baby wasn't ready to make his appearance. It even got to the point that I couldn't even really fart out little ghost babies. Everything was building and growing inside of me. Festering to create something evil and tainted.
Finally after almost three days, I felt the need to release this beast. I took my position on the toliet, ready to unlease this monster onto this world.....but unfortunately by ass had another idea. It was just a tiny, tiny baby poop. The pressure still full and uncomfortable in my belly. The beast was just fooling me. I thought I would be free of its grasp, but he was just releasing what he couldn't use, to build a stronger and more painful release. Another day went by, I ate and he ate. Fueling and growing.
I was at work, just doing my thing. Stocking the salesfloor, minding my own business, when out of nowhere the immediate urge to shit came upon me at full force. I dropped everything I was doing and ran to the bathroom. I sat down and let this demon rip through me. Tearing my ass apart. Taking full form, ready to destroy this earth. It almost felt like I was giving birth to a child. Which I very well could have, this shit was massive. It could have gotten up and taken over Wal-Mart, but I, quick as lightning, flushed that beast down the toliet.
So here I am, freed from the beast. I destroyed a demon. I, Madoka Malika, pooped today.
What is your favorite poop story? Are you surprised that girls poop? Do you still think I am hot?
Stay tuned for more of my fun filled adventures and many more!