If you are looking for a blog about gaming or books or whatever you would expect from me just throw all those expectations out the window. It is time for a serious blog.
I have had a lot on my mind recently and thought putting it all down would help me sort out and come to terms with what all has happened in my life recently. I have had a huge curveball thrown into my life and I was not at all mentally or emotionally ready for it to happen. I had a plan and I was damn sure sticking to it. It seemed that all the puzzle pieces were neatly falling into place. It is only when you think all in life is going well that the game of life decides to throw its curveball at you and see how you handle it. I won't go into too much detail about my personal curveball but I thought I'd write this to maybe help others through this mess we call the game of life.
When I first found out my bad news there was a lot, I mean, a lot of crying. The news hit me like a load of bricks and completely took my breath away. I didn't know what to do or what to think. I felt very lost. My whole lifes' dream seemed to be slipping between my fingers and I couldn't seem to get a grip on it. Most people handle their bad news in many ways, some cry like me, others sulk and won't talk to anyone, however you deal with your news I would recommend talking to someone about what has transpired. Because having and hearing another persons point of view of the situation can always help put things into light. I know if I hadn't talked to Juice and many others I would probably still be a crying, weeping mess and still very lost as to what I should be doing next. BUT remember just because you seek someone out for advice does not mean you have to take it. In the end it should be YOU deciding your own fate. Only you can decide how you will hit that curveball.
I truly believe that a person is defined by how they handle the tough choices and hard parts in their life. Anyone can seem to have an easy life and seem happy, but it is when someone goes through hell do you see their true colors and what a person can truly do. I have been through hell and back again many times. This game of life seems to keep throwing its curveball at me hoping to completely knock me down and hope that I don't get back up. BUT I do keep getting back up. And I think that is what makes a strong person. One who gets knocked down but chooses, I mean truly chooses to get back up and look LIFE right in the face and say "I am not giving up". Too many people give up when the going gets tough, but I am here to say that life will always have its tough moments. You can't give up.
Ok, so now you had your curveball and you have talked to your people you trust, what now? I start devising a new plan of action. What steps do I need to take to still reach my goal? Or find a new goal and plan? In my situation I have done both. I have a plan of action to still reach my original goal but I also have a back-up plan in case I get another curveball. I know what I want to do in my life and I know I will probably get hell from my family for not doing and going through with my goal in the "traditional" way. But I don't give a damn, and that is the biggest thing I have to come to terms with. That this is MY life and I should be doing things that make me happy and not worry about anyone else. As soon as you start putting yourself first and your happiness first, everything else seems to fall into place with a little more ease. You let go of that burden of guilt when you know you don't please someone. I have a real problem of being a people-pleaser. I have learned through life though that you can't make everyone happy, you just can't. I wish I could just take everyones' sorrows away so we could all be happy but I know that I cannot do that. It is only after realizing that, did I start to make better choices for my own happiness.
I know this was kind of a lengthy blog, so if you made it this far congrats! I hope in reading this you were able to relate or learn something new that may help you the next time life decides to throw you a curveball.
I would also like to thank you all in this community for being very supportive. I posted a QP last week that was very vague and got a lot of positive comments and really helped me stay positive during this time. I love that I can be on here and always have some sort of support system even though we may barely know each other. So THANK YOU ALL!! <3