You Are Tearing Me Apart Destructoid!

God damnit. Just god damnit guys. God damnit. God damnit. God FUCKING damnit guys. What the hell guys? Like seriously? WHAT THE FU-

*deep breath, goes to happy place* Okay I'm good.

It seems like these last two weeks on Destructoid have been bumpy to say the least. After the mass exodus last week from the forums and the recent news that the forums will be shutting down this week (causing even more people to say they're leave), it just seems like there's been a lot of bad blood going around lately. I'm not going to pretend that I know the situation all that well or why everything that's happened has been happening at all. I had a forum account, but I never visited that often, mostly because A) I didn't have the time to visit B)I was never that big on forums in general, and C) I forgot my login info and was too lazy to look it up. As such I'm not going to sit here and talk about what's been going on the forums like I've been there for years, since I have no emotionally attachment to the place one way or another. However, as someone who's been here for four years (five this month), seeing this kind of split among the community tears me apart inside, even if people are getting mad over something that I was never a part of. People are going to leave no matter what. This isn't the first time people leave Dtoid, and it won't be the last.

But that doesn't make it hurt any less.

These last two weeks have been the equivalent of watching your parents get into a fight with your older sibling: you love them both deeply, you can see where they're both coming from, but if you side with one or the other, than Thanksgiving is going to be more awkward then it already is. And having been in that situation in real life myself a few times, it isn't pleasent. I get where Niero is coming from when it comes to the forums, but I can also see where many of the long time veteran forum users are coming from too. This is just one of those situations where everyone has acted bad in one way or another, and in the end no one wins.

I'm not writing this to condemn anybody. I'm not going to try to convince those of you who have left or are going to leave to stay, since I imagine that ship has sailed. I'm also not asking for calm either because I'm sure that ship has also sailed too. And I also imagine that for some of you reading this, it might be the first time you'll hear about this; so to those people I say: oops, I'm sorry. So what is the point of this you may ask?

Honestly I don't know myself. I've said before that I'm not leaving this place anytime soon, and I still mean that. I may not visit as often or comment as much as I use to, but I still love this place and I visit as much as I can. You guys are like one giant family to me, and though I haven't met many of you in person (though after this I doubt that will happen now), I consider you friends and I love all of you. And for all I know, I may be crying over nothing and have my info wrong and I'm full of it.

But at the same time, I'm not going to pretend like this isn't hurting me. Because it is. I love this place, and I hate to see it get torn apart like this I really do. I know it's a part of life, but that doesn't make it hurt any less. Hopefully those of you who are still here after all of this is said and done can help me pick up the pieces and do what we can to put the puzzle back together, despite some pieces missing. 

Sorry if this sounds rambly (is that even a word?) or incoherent or if this upsets people. I just wanted to get this off my chest since it's been bugging me for awhile. Promise the next thing I write here is more upbeat.

- Dynamite with a laser beam!

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