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Puppy Bowl X Preview

Time once again for the unofficial Destructoid Puppy Bowl Preview.� Last year�s pick of Aurora was looking good until she threw a crushing pick-6 near the end of the game.

Who will take the MVP title this year?� Let�s look at the competition

Name: Abdiel
Breed(s): Labrador Retriever/Terrier Mix
Fun Fact: Feels Labs get a bad rap about shedding
Isay Take: As much as Macklemore gets a bad rap about rap?? HA, TOPICAL!� The size of a lab with the motor of a terrier could be the combination that pushes Abdiel to the top

Name: Alvin
Breed(s): Poodle
Fun Fact: Favorite color is Raspberry.
Isay Take: There�s only one man who would dare give me the raspberry!� Alvin needs to outthink his opponents to take the title

Name: Artemis
Breed(s): Labrador Retriever/Sato Mix
Fun Fact: Goes nuts for cat videos
Isay Take: Artemis might be distracted knowing that the Hallmark Channel is airing the Kitten Bowl at the same time.�She needs to keep her focus on the game in order to stand a chance.

Name: August
Breed(s): Boxer
Fun Fact: Wants to follow the band moe. across the country
Isay Take: What�s the matter, Guster not touring this year?

Name: Aurora
Breed(s): Dalmatian
Fun Fact: Has a crush on a fireman
Isay Take: Aurora needs to use her head and not her heart to SPOT the opportunities to score

Name: Bach
Breed(s): Bernese Mountain Dog/Poodle Mix
Fun Fact: Thinks Mozart is overrated
Isay Take: Bach has the combination of brains and brawn that can help him HANDEL the competition

Name: Bayla
Breed(s): Boxer/Hound Mix
Fun Fact: Prefers Carrie Underwood's version of the Sunday Night Football theme
Isay Take: Bayla�s got the competition on their knees.� Bayla can�t be begging (darlin� please) if she wants to be the Cream of the competition

Name: Benton
Breed(s): Labrador Retriever
Fun Fact: Plans to one day have a really important job serving as a guide dog
Isay Take: Benton needs to use that focus to find the end zone a few times.� This is the perfect stage to show those skills.

Name: Brody
Breed(s): American Eskimo
Fun Fact: One day wants to own his own dog house
Isay Take: A dog owning their own house???�Now I�ve heard everything.� He may know 50 different words for snow, but the one word he needs to know for the Puppy Bowl is touchdown.

Name: Coco
Breed(s): Poodle Mix
Fun Fact: Hope LA gets an NFL team soon
Isay Take: You can bring a team to LA, but you can�t make them go to the games.� Coco needs that gogo to stand out from the field.

Name: Cody
Breed(s): Spaniel
Fun Fact: Thinks fatherhood has mellowed Kanye
Isay Take: As long as he keeps moving North-South and less East-West, Cody should be right there in the mix

Name: Danny
Breed(s): Papillon Mix
Fun Fact: Aspires to have hair like One Direction's "Harry Styles"
Isay Take: Like with Cody, the one direction Danny needs to be moving is toward the endzone, he should be fine.

Name: Dee Dee
Breed(s): Terrier Mix
Fun Fact: Believes the best movie kiss was Kate and Leonardo in "Titanic"
Isay Take: I have never seen Titanic from beginning to end.� I�m quite proud of that.� Dee Dee needs to become Tee Dee.

Name: Delachaise
Breed(s): Pit Bull Mix
Fun Fact: Loves New Orleans Jazz
Isay Take: Delachaise (Della) needs to use those improvisational skills to bebop her way across the field.�Hopefully, no scat as well.

Name: Ginger
Breed(s): Old English Sheepdog Mix
Fun Fact: Counting sheep automatically puts her to sleep
Isay Take: Talk about being in the wrong profession.� If she can�t keep up with the more active pups, look for Ginger to throw in the towel early.

Name: Hudson
Breed(s): Great Pyrenees
Fun Fact: Thinks Seabiscuit is a fish-flavored dog treat
Isay Take: Needs to avoid the neigh sayers and horse around with his competition

Name: Jillian
Breed(s): Shih Tzu/Pekingese Mix
Fun Fact: Wants to go to this year's Kentucky Derby
Isay Take: Jilly?

Name: Laney
Breed(s): Brittany Spaniel Mix
Fun Fact: Wants to catch a ride on one of those NASA Mars rovers
Isay Take: I know dogs like to chase cars, but this is ridiculous!!� Laney just needs to make sure the competition is chasing her.

Name: Lily
Breed(s): Bassett Hound
Fun Fact: Tries not to step on her own ears
Isay Take: Her low center of gravity should help take on the big hits, but Lily needs to stay on her feet if she wants to blossom on the field.

Name: Loren
Breed(s): Brittany Spaniel Mix
Fun Fact: Prefers NCAA 14 to Madden 25

Name: Lucy
Breed(s): Poodle Mix
Fun Fact: Wants her paws on the Hollywood Walk of Fame
Isay Take: Look for Lucy to find the nearest camera and stay there until the end of the game.� She looks to more focused on future endorsement deals than any prize.

Name: Mandy
Breed(s): Dachsund/Hound Mix
Fun Fact: Thinks long legs are overrated
Isay Take: Needs to channel all that energy and keep badgering her opponents throwing them off their game.� Should be able to break a few tackles that can hopefully lead to some big plays.

Name: Max
Breed(s): Shih Tzu
Fun Fact: Wants One Direction and The Wanted to just get along
Isay Take: /Googles �One Direction and The Wanted Feud�
�������������� //Throws computer out the window

Name: Mila
Breed(s): Pit Bull
Fun Fact: Adores the theatre, but always arrives late
Isay Take: While a slow start won�t necessarily keep Mila out of contention, if she finishes strong it may be what the judges remember most about the game.

Name: Opie
Breed(s): Schnauzer/Terrier Mix
Fun Fact: Favorite cartoon is Marmaduke
Isay Take: Opie needs keep up the RUSH in order to make a SPLASH with the judges.


Name: Parker
Breed(s): Labrador Retriever/Husky Mix
Fun Fact: Has an autograph from Uga, the University of Georgia mascot
Isay Take: Parker should be one of the biggest pups out there.� If he can avoid getting caught up with the small breeds, he could easily overpower everyone.*

Name: Pong
Breed(s): Havenese Mix
Fun Fact: Has been to Disney World 12 times
Isay Take: Judas Priest, 12 times?!?!�Pong may get bored out there on the field at this rate

Name: Poppy
Breed(s): Shih Tzu/Brussells Griffon Mix
Fun Fact: Favorite director is Paul Feig
Isay Take: Poppy can�t be a Bridesmaid and wait for the action to come to her.� Needs to bring the Heat to stand a chance with the bigger pups.

Name: Prada
Breed(s): Boxer
Fun Fact: Would never be caught dead in Burberry
Isay Take: Who would put clothes on a dog?

Name: Roxy
Breed(s): Shih Tzu/Chihuahua Mix
Fun Fact: Compares herself to another Georgia girl, Julia Roberts
Isay Take: Is that the toothy girl from Mystic Pizza?


Name: Shyla
Breed(s): Great Pyrenees
Fun Fact: Favorite actress is Melissa McCarthy
Isay Take: Looks like Shyla and Poppy may find a connection over film.� Will they play nice with everyone else is a bigger question.

Name: Sparky
Breed(s): Yorkshire Terrier
Fun Fact: Hopes to spend his summers playing volleyball on Manhattan Beach
Isay Take: A dog playing volleyball??? Now I�ve heard everything!

Name: Suri
Breed(s): Siberian Husky
Fun Fact: Thinks they should cut Miley Cyrus some slack
Isay Take: Suri�s size should help her Cruise past the competition.

Side note 1: Miley Cyrus�bless her heart.

Side note 2: GROSS

Name: Taser
Breed(s): Italian Greyhound
Sex: Male
Age: 12 weeks
Fun Fact: Wants to drink from a fountain in Rome
Isay Take: Likely to shock the other dogs by his speed, Taser could run circles around the field before anyone is able to react.

Name: Tyga
Breed(s): Pit Bull
Fun Fact: Knows what the Fox says
Isay Take: I saw that video�meh.� Now Bad Lip Reading, you�re onto something there

Name: Ullie
Breed(s): Dachsund/Chihuahua Mix
Fun Fact: Hates all those Rocky sports clich�s about Philadelphia
Isay Take: Ullie�s got to eat lightning and crap thunder if she wants to win.� Also she�ll want whiz on her cheesesteak with onions and hot peppers (AND I WANT LUNCH)!� She�s got a star behind her to cheer her to victory.� Just who is it?

You guessed it, Frank Stallone

Name: Van Helsing
Breed(s): Bassett Hound
Fun Fact: Learned to waterski from a squirrel
Isay Take: A dog that can waterski??? Now I�ve heard everything.� Like with Lily, Van Helsing needs to stay on his feet and strike through the heart of the defense.

Name: Wyatt
Breed(s): Terrier Mix
Fun Fact: Dreams of walking the Appalachian Trail
Isay Take: The AT is roughly 2,200 miles.�The Puppy Bowl certainly isn�t always a sprint, so Wyatt�s endurance training could pay off if he can stay in the entire game

Suri and Parker should tower over the competition, but even they might have enough to overcome Taser�s speed.� If those 3 get distracted, look for smaller dogs like Mandy or Della to swoop in and steal the title.

Oh yeah, there are Super Bowl storylines too

*Note: During the typing of that sentence, 3 Uga's died**

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About Isay Isayone of us since 2:08 PM on 02.13.2009

Isay Isay is a 40 year old gamer living in Columbus, OH. I cut my teeth on the early Sierra/Lucasarts adventure games and honed my skills on the Genesis. I'm a proud poppa of 2. You might already be aware of my style of PUN-ditry

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PSN: Isay_Isay
Steam: Isay_Isay

Currently Playing
PSP/PSV - Steins Gate
PS3 - ???

On the Queue
Ugh Too many to list honestly

What's in a name?
So where does Isay Isay come from? Well to amuse myself, I name all my characters I say so whenever someone talks to them they sound like Foghorn Leghorn or what I thought English people sounded like when I was little. Needless to say, I'm easily amused.

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