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LONG BLOG

Hatesgiving.

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So I heard Thanksgiving is this week in Americaland. I was going to write a blog about things in games I’m thankful for but then I realised that would be a bad idea because

(a) I really like games and I would go on forever.
(b) I’ve never celebrated Thanksgiving before and don’t know what it is (it’s about you guys committing genocide or something right?)
(c) Its more fun to be a dick and complain anyway.

So with that in mind I set out to write about things that we shouldn’t be thankful for, things that we should in fact hate and get rid of in gaming. And that’s how Hatesgiving was born. A time for us to moan and whinge about all the little things that annoy us, no matter how stupid or immature our reasons are, and without rebuttal or debate. It’s kind of like Rapture, only instead of a city under the sea, it’s a holiday I made up. So in the spirit of acting like an ungrateful complainy-pants, let us order take-away, isolate ourselves from our family and grumble about things we don’t like.

Unpauseable cut scenes.



Alright, at first this was just one of those little things that bothered me a little bit, but as time goes on the more I see it the more it winds me up. I’m talking of course about floaty sticky back swords. For those of you that don’t know floaty sticky back swords are the weapons that magically float or stick to your characters back completely unassisted by any type of sheath or holster. There are theories as to how these weapons stay afloat, such as, the same invisible force that holds Cloud hair in place also holds his sword, Dante’s weapons are held on his back by sheer awesomeness, and the ever popular hypothesis of Nathan Drake and his magnetic spine. Yes this is finicky infantile nit-picking but that’s what Hatesgiving is all about

Phew, there we go. Childish self-indulgent rant over. I may not understand Thanksgiving but I still want you guys to have a good time, and if any of the stuff above is your biggest problem, then you really do have a lot to be thankful for. So join in on the Hatesgiving festivities and air your grievances below, don’t worry, we won’t judge.
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About Handyone of us since 1:44 PM on 09.14.2009

Welcome to the blog.... you must be bored. anyway im Handy, I'm a student in Ireland and I'm here to talk about whatever may come into my mind....so not much then.

Lets see... I’ve been playing games pretty much my whole life, since my Commodore back in the day to my ps3 now I’ve been hooked. Actually come to think of it I can’t remember a time I wasn’t playing games. Can’t say I have a favourite genre, I like to try a bit of everything, though I will go to town on a good RPG. I’ll have something to fill in this space as soon as my life becomes interesting.

^^^ Seriously, I wrote that like four years ago and still nothing interesting has happened.



Like everyone else on Destructoid I’m at a loss on what to fill this space with so I guess I’ll just catalogue my greatest hits, if you can call a loose collection of lists and borderline pornographic fanart “greatest hits”.



Listmania – Because liking something isn’t as important as liking it in the correct order.

Game plots that are clearly rip-offs: Part two

Gamings Greatest Slinky Invisible Women with Huge Asses

E3 Approaches: The E3 survival guide!

Something about E3: 34 things you’ll have to hear soon

Lost? Lonely? Looking for Love?

Gaming’s worst legal guardians

Gaming DIY

Valentine’s Day, Shmalentine’s.....Shmay

Get a new look at the Gaming Salon!

Hatesgiving

The NPC survival guide

Game lessons that don’t work in real life



Fanart Flops – Because you must suffer.

Fanart Flops: Back by (Un)Popular Demand

Fanart Flops: Eyebleach, I Choose You Edition

Fanart Flops: Octopus Hojo Edition

Fanart Flops: Stop Raping My Childhood Edition

Fanart Flops. (Possibly NSFW)



Wankery – The terrible results of when I pretend I’m smart.

Dear Industry: I Am Not a Psychopath

Final Fantasy Versus Itself

Only Human


The culture Gap



Sargasm – Because I’m kind of a dick.

Darksiders 2 in a nutshell

The Boy Who Cried Wolf

How Dare You, Capcom

Death to Red Shepard!

How to make a sequel

Why FFXIII is the worst one EVAR!

The Scandalous Scam of Samit Sarkar!

In the name of SCIENCE!!!




Front page – When Destructoid has terrible lapses in judgement.


Top 12 Videogame porno parodies (NSFW)

Handy’s X-mas X-travaganza begins now!

Game plots that are clearly rip-offs

Comments of the Week: Busst Stop

Comments of the week: George Michael Warfare 3



Don’t forget Comments of the Week

Comments of the Week: Tinfoil Hat Edition







Just because.
PSN ID:Handy2


 

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